Some of the respondents question the wisdom of their membership and/or are on the brink of leaving the UMC but have not yet taken that step. A number of the respondents questioning their membership and/or loyalty are clergy.

I have been a member for 50 years -- from age 2 1/2! I stay because I was raised in this church. I have also been a long-term member of [the annual conference] and am involved in related Methodist groups -- most importantly, MFSA. I am more and more disgruntled, disappointed, and perhaps even ready to move on beyond the UMC and even organized religion altogether!

It is a love/hate relationship. Do I leave (again) because they are so hypocritical, or do I stay in the struggle for change..... One day I want to stay and make a difference. The next day I ask why do I bother. I really do not need the UMC. But then perhaps they need me and just don't realize it yet.

My involvement has lessened since the last General Conference. My partner and I are in the process of making a decision this year as to whether to stay or leave the denomination.

I am seriously considering changing to the [deleted] where I can be an open lesbian pastor. I am giving up pastoring a church this spring and will be a fulltime psychotherapist still within the UMC. But that is becoming uncomfortable.

I have a meaningful and vital covenant relationship with the members of my order and with the church. I also have a growing sense that the fullness of who I am is larger than the church will tolerate. I continue to bend in order to fit. My need to grow may bring me to break relationship.

Right now I have very mixed feelings. I am fortunate to be involved with a UMC that is supportive, but I am also in one of the more conservative conferences.... I have been close to resigning my membership several times.

I was terribly disappointed by the decision at General Conference to uphold recent restrictions against blessings of same-sex unions and ordination of out GLBT persons. These restrictions affect me personally because I have felt called to ministry since my youth, and I have decided against pursuing a seminary education twice before because of the language in the discipline against GLBT persons. At the age of forty I am beginning to struggle with the call again, and this has lead me to consider leaving the UMC to join the UCC and pursue ordination in that denomination.

I have questioned my membership on many occasions because of the stand the church continues to take against me.

I appreciate my individual UMC being out front in its ministry to gays, lesbians and transgendered, but I feel conflicted about the broader church policy on gays and lesbians. I sometimes feel I've compromised my principles by staying in a denomination that rejects me. I was confirmed [another denomination] and feel an affinity toward that denomination, but I've been a United Methodist since age 16. I'm not sure I could find what I'm looking for by leaving the UMC, because I don't think other denominations have policies that different from the UMC.

I often contemplate leaving the United Methodist Church. I am a seminary graduate and considered going into the Methodist ministry for a long time. I came out to myself and the world during graduate school and gave up the idea.

I am quite ambivalent about my membership. I cherish our UM heritage and message of God's grace freely given for all people, but find the current tone in the denomination quite troubling. It appears to me that a large majority of the church has decided that their minds are made up against me without a willingness to evaluate the facts.

I am uncertain about continuing. Family and friends that I have known all my life accepted me after I came out and church was still a loving environment. Last year my partner and I moved out of state and since then I have been reevaluating my loyalty to the UMC. While I attend my new church weekly I have not yet transferred my membership.

If I find a particular church in which I would be comfortable and get spiritual nurturing, I have no problem going there, Methodist or not. So don't assume undying loyalty. I have remained Methodist out of laziness, lack of something better, and I like the "order of Worship" as well as the singing. Maybe that seems superficial but it's true.

The church is my family, and you have to love your family unconditionally. But right now, I feel like the exclusionary practices of the UMC are abusive. How long can I stay in this abusive family? I don't know.

I frequently wonder why I continue to be so active, given the national climate. Never the less, I have been attending Reconciling United Methodist churches and appreciate the welcome I have received there.

I am a minister on leave of absence and reassessing my relationship to the UMC.... I am seeking God's guidance in regard to my calling as an ordained minister and where I fit as a gay man. I wish to practice Wesleyan spirituality but that is difficult to do in most local congregations of the United Methodist Church (weekly Communion as a primary component of spiritual discipline). But local congregations provide most of the means of grace to practice Wesleyan spirituality, and that keeps me affiliated in a minimum way. Because of struggles with a local congregation and the bishop of the annual conference over LGBT issues, I prefer to have as little involvement with the UM Church as possible.

Right now I am very tentative about my membership. I am a lifelong Methodist and a charter member of a local church. I taught Sunday School and worked with youth for 15-20 years. My sexual orientation was never questioned until a conservative pastor was appointed to our church.... [T]he Christian Education Director... indicated that I would have to agree to be celibate in order to teach Sunday School. I learned from that experience that as a gay United Methodist, I would never be truly safe in any church that did not include sexual orientation in their statement of welcome or inclusion.

I have very mixed feelings about continuing my relationship with the UMC. I have thought about leaving in the past, but I remain hopeful that I can help work some change from within the church.

As a UM clergy serving in campus ministry supported by the UMC, I am required to be active in the church. I enjoy my work, but wish I had more freedom to tell all of my story. Still, I am lucky to be in an appointment where I can be out. My partner and I have started a family, and even though I can be out in my position, the threat of the UM policy toward gay clergy has prompted me to consider transferring [to another] denomination.

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